Special..( Part - 2 )

Dedicated to all the GIRLS I’ve come across in my life.Specially for – RITIKA and NEETU ( the best girls I’ve ever met..they still don’t cease to surprise me! )

( CONTINUED AFTER THE FIRST PART.. )

I had a heated debate with that bastard HOD over why I don’t want IIT any more..

After half an hour..

HOD - What do you think of yourself ? director banega.. mazak samajh rakha hai life ko ?

Me – sir I tried to be serious about life. ‘think prctically’, ‘ be an enginner.. it has great scope..’ , I really tried to follow these rules.. only to find unhappiness.. chaha , mama, bua, mausi, padosi, family friends everybody had thier opinion as to how I could be succesful.. but none had even a single thought about my happiness. It took me 7 months of frustration and confusion to understand that its better ( for me.. if not for my “well wishers” ) to treat life as a joke, follow my heart and be happy, than to be serious and be a little less “succesful”. Besides happiness is my measure of success not the width of my house or the length of my car. Any ways these kind of talks are not for engineers like you. Maybe I should take your leave now?

HOD- life is not as easy as your bullshit philosophy. How do you think you are going to get there.

Me- don’t know yet. But ya, I know what’s going to be my first step – leave this bloody institute- FIITJEE.

He was bewildered.

HOD- huh .. do you think your parents will allow this? (confident that parents are always there to stop children from following their dreams when everyone else has failed.)

ME- Sir they are my parents not yours. So please don’t bother to think too much about them, your brain is only good for physics. I know how to convince them. Thankyou.

And I stood up and went to the door and exited the room. Super canary shit ! how could i say all that! Yes ! finally ! finally I could answer that bastard back and shut his mouth up. I got the courage to defend myself. Finally I have the courage to say to all my ‘well wishers’-“ you suck !”. its my life and I’ll will live it in my own way ( as long as I’m not breaking law- the one laid out by constitution I mean, not by the society ). And all this has happened because of her. She was like an angle who with her mere touch and pleasant eyes wiped all the scars of gloom and despair away. I went to her , she was sitting on the same bench with her back towards me. I went close to her and patted her shoulder. She turned back and seeing me her eyes beamed with excitement. “hey kya hua ?? kaisa raha so called counseling ” she asked her eyes reflecting the eagerness inside her. I smiled and said “lets just say, he won’t call me to his brain-hammering sessions anymore.”. “ wow dude!” she exclaimed and we hi-fived. “All because of you.. really. I can’t thank you in words. Chalo lets do one thing.. just make a wish.. ask for anything, I’ll fulfill your wish.. will do anything for you!”

-“OK! Here’s my wish! You’ll have to spend the rest of the day with me.. on my own terms !”

-“cool” I agreed ( unaware of how drastic her terms would be..)

Just then my mobile beeped. And as I was about to pick it up she stopped me and ordered – “ my first condition- while with me, cell phone- switched off. I hate mobiles!” she had told me this earlier also. She felt that mobiles have taken away the mystery and passion out of relationships and that.. well well I’ll tell you about it some other time. Coming back to the track.. I switched off my mobile ( it was her day !). “condition 2 – I don’t have my scooty today as I came with Tisha, so you’ll have to take me wherever I want and drop me back home.” Thus came the second condition. “ what?? You mean you’ll ride my bike and we’ll roam all over the city” I inquired. “ no here’s my condition no. 3 - you can use any other means of transport other than your bike.. or your friend’s bike in that case” she clarified. I was stunned! “ what ? I mean how?” I asked bewildered.

-“ think .. but first lets start walking..” and she started walking .. just aimlessly.. I followed her.

-“ do u know how crazy you go sometimes..?”

- “yes I know..” she said without looking at me but I know she was controlling her smile..

-“ what.. you really serious about it..” I asked and stopped.

She turned towards me and said “koi shaq?” and raised an eyebrow. And again started walking. I had no option again to follow her. I finally surrendered.

-“ OK fine! Where exactly do you want to go?”

- “ to INDIAN COFFEE HOUSE... I want coffee..”

-“ what? You want to go to ICH??? Wahan toh sab uncle aunty, buddhe log jate hai yaar..!”

-“ but I want to go there only !”

-“ok” I sighed .. thought for a moment to find a way to reach there and said- “ so.. we’ll catch a tempo, go to sector-10 chowk and then walk upto ICH.. will that be ok ?!”

-“ but I want to go to supela ICH”

-“ WHAT???????????????????????????” phew !

After changing 3 tempos, walking a few meters we reached ICH. ‘ a building can’t be more gloomy than this ‘ I thought looking at the ICH building. We went inside. Everybody’s eyes were scorching us! Girl and boy together ! bhilai.. bhilai ! we sat at a table, and a turbaned waiter arrived.. “ do cofee “ I ordered but madame’ had more frills-“ doodh zyaada, cheeni zyaada, aur filter coffee hi honi chahiye..”. the waiter nodded and went away! She looked around the hall with a shine of remembrance dancing in her eyes.. and said “you know I picked up the habit of drinking coffee from here only. My father used to take me here every Saturday. He would order coffee and I would take sambar vada. One day I relented that I want coffee.. and my sweet dad couldn’t deny. As time passed our visits to this place decreased and lately almost vanished. You know we change with time but this place hasn’t changed. The coffee tastes just the way it used to in the past. the plastic chairs and wooden tables are the same. The waiters don't dress in fancy suits.. they’ve stuck to whites and turbans.” I kept looking at her and listening to every word of hers, with my hand on my cheek . its this very innocence of hers which makes me surrender to her. By then the coffee arrived and over the hot cup of coffee we talked about various things.. about her childhood, my childhood.. school life before FIITJEE- hers and mine. Really ! a lot can happen over a cup of coffee! After some time we came out of ICH. I again looked at the building. It didn’t seem so gloomy anymore, she had infused brightness into that building, just the way she had in my life!

-“ so what next?”

- “hmmm........................................................”

TO BE CONTINUED .................

DISCLAIMER :-

ALL THE EVENTS AND CHARACTERS ARE FICTITIOUS. ANY RESEMBLANCE IS JUST A COINCIDENCE.

Special..( Part - 1 )

Dedicated to all the GIRLS I’ve come across in my life. Specially for – RITIKA and NEETU ( the best girls I’ve ever met.. they still don’t cease to surprise me ! )

“Shit shit shit !!!!” I shouted rather barked loud enough to attract the attention of 50 something students who like me were crowding near the rank list, to check their scores of the latest monthly test of FIITJEE ( where I don’t know how or why I was taking coaching for IIT-JEE for the past 6-7 months ). “Easy.. easy.. what happened?” she said coming (almost rushing) towards me. Of course , she was the only one who was concerned about my over-reaction. The rest were in no time, back to checking their own scores. For them, nothing in this world is more important than their scores. “hey ! what happened? Come lets go and sit there..” she said ( I could see genuine concern in her eyes ) and pointed toward the bench in the lawn outside the office. We walked to the bench and sat besides each other. In bhilai, a girl and a boy sitting together on a secluded bench is considered a taboo of sorts. But she didn’t care about what people say and think, she cared about only one thing, that I was in distress and badly needed support.

-“ you ok ?” she said calmly. ( Oh god ! she’s sooo sweet ).

-“yes”. I said (almost hushed) and nodded my head.

-“what’s the matter?” she asked.

-“again in bottom 10 ! again ! I mean I’m so bloody sick of seeing my name on this bloody shit rank list which hangs there every bloody month ... pardon my lingo.”

-“its ok ! its ok ! chill !!”

-“ no it’s not bloody ok ! everything that’s going on is not ok... I mean why am I in a place like this.. full of geeks, creepy mathematics symbols, hammering machines operating on some damn laws formulated by bastards like einstien and newton, and not to miss the suffocating chemical reactions... Pardon my lingo again .“

-“ offo ! leave it yaar. Kuch nai hota .”

-“ hota hai yaar.. bohot kuch..! I can’t tell you how frustrated I am with these classes which take the hell out of me. And I feel like a jackass, who is capable of doing nothing.. bloody nothing . and I hurl all this frustration on my mummy and brother! I mean I shouldn’t do this! But it happens! You know when I go home after checking my scores and mummy asks me about them, I wish the earth would split and devour me. It feels so shameful. My throat chokes while talking to dad on phone when he calls from office to enquire about my marks. I mean, look at me, I’m wasting his hard earned money ! I feel so disspirited and guilty. But then when I sit to study ... aaaaarrrrggghhhhh... it feels like hell ! I mean how does it matter to me whether the refrigirator or a radio works X way and not Y way !”

-“listen...” she was about to say something but I continued gushing out my agony...

-“ and to add to all this, every month there’s a summon to the HOD , and his discouraging words only add to the agony . saala b@#$%^&*~ .” ( aah! A hindi swear word is so relieving, I wonder how I could swear in front of her, how I could do whatever I want when with her .. can you find a girl before whom you can swear? )

- “this time also you are summoned?”

- “ya in bottom ten ! what else do you expect?”

-“hmm... when?”

-“in the next half an hour. I’ve to meet him in the staff room. Its scary ! I am speechless in fron of him. I feel helpless.. I feel..”

- “ shhh..” she hushed me and took my hand in hers. She then entangled her fingers with mine and gripped my hand.. tightly. Oh god ! it felt sooo good. I heaved a breath of relief. “ look at me” she said keeping the calmness intact. I looked into her eyes- serene and tranquil. She blinked her eyes softly, gesturing- ‘its alright! I AM THERE FOR YOU ‘. And then it was magic. I was rejuvanated . A smile gleamed on my face.. just a little.. but a genuine one. Yes! It was there.. it had been missing for a long time now. I was looking into her eyes and she continued-“ listen.. no matter what happens in future.. no matter what people say or believe.. remember just one thing- YOU ROCK ! I believe in you. I’ll be there for you come what may ! whatever path you choose in your life, remember that my support and faith are always with you. Whenever you feel scared or depressed just imagine that I’m always holding your hand just like this. Never let anyone or anything bog you down. Always believe in yourself just the way I believe in you.” And for the next half an hour or so I kept looking into her eyes.. my hands still in the firm grip of hers. She finally inturrupted the silence – “ you must go now. Its time. And don’t be scared. Just put forward your point. Go rock! And take the hell out of that bastard HOD.”

- “woah woah .. what’s with the lingo huh?”

-“ what ! you guys think only you can abuse !” she said and smiled naughtily.

I smiled back and started walking towards the staff room. After walking a few steps I paused.. turned back and rushed to the bench. “ hey ! thanks a ton. I can’t tell you how -...“

-“later” she inturrupted. ” I’m waiting for you right here. First finish up your meeting and then we’ll talk. Even I have to tell you something very important. “

-“ohk ohk ..”

I said and rushed to the staff rrom. I reached the door of the staff room . I held the knob. BUT SHIT ! again nervousness held me captive. My feet ran cold, my heart was thumping, my forehead and palms went sweaty. I was almost trembling. But just then, I felt a gentle touch on my hands. It was her. Yes ! her fingers slowly started tangling with mine and she finally gripped my hand tightly just the way she did sometime earlier. Nobody else could see her. But for me she was there. I was looking into her pleasent eyes. She was with me. I turned the knob ,opened the door and went in...............................

TO BE CONTINUED... ( WAIT FOR THE COMING PARTS..)

PHIRR SE....

( before you read - it's a poem written by me.. its the first time i have attempted a poem. this poem "PHIRR SE" is about the moment when fate brings you face to face with your troubled past after a long gap of time (say 10- 20 years) . it can be anything.. like lovers separated, friends who submitted themselves to their ego and broke the beautiful relationship and all such situations ... I dedicate this post to my idol- one n only GULZAR SAAB)

Na jaane kyun ye silsila shuru hua phirr se,

kyun wo chehra roobaroo aaya phirr se...

waqt ka pahiya bohot tez ghumne laga hi tha..

ke aaj achanak is lamhe par aakar tham gaya phirr se...

socha tha ro ro kar ye aankhen sukh gayin hongi..

magar aankhon me nami laut aayi phirr se...

nafrat ki jin zanjeeron se bandh liya tha apni chahat ko,

ek jhatke me wo saari zanjeeren pighel gayi phirr se...

jin aankhon ke toofaani sagar se dil ki kashti ko kheench nikala tha kabhi...

unhin aankhon me is dil ne gota mara phirr se ...

wo zehreeele khwaab jinhe kismat ke takiye ke neeche daba diya tha kabhi ...

unhin khwabon ne nainon ko dasa phirr se...

mujhe toh laga tha kismat apne saare chal chal chuki hai,

magar kismat ne fenka apna shaatir paintra phirr se..

na jaane kyun ye silsila shuru hua phirr se,

kyun wo chehra roobaroo aaya phir se ....

.....................................................
by prashant

Gratitude !!!!!!

Hi frns!! While I’am writing this post I am on cloud 9. 9 followeres in less than 9 months of its launch ! now I don’t know whether it can be called a good growth of my blog or not … but I am delighted.

This time round once again I don’t have a specific topic to write on. I’m writing this post to extend my heartfelt gratitude to some special people … so here I go !!-

Big big big thankyou to all the readers of my blog. It is because of you that my blog has achieved whatever little success it got. There are a few people whom I’d like to thank specially.. let’s start with mmm…mmm….. ok vishakha. She was the first person who started following the blog without me asking her to do that. This showed her genuine interest in my blog. Besides she gave a flattering comment – "I am ur big fan from now".It felt nice.. sorry I think I should remove the garb of modesty- it was a fantastic feeling!!! The second person on my list would be mmm ….mm … ok I’m going to name 4 people together, sumit , harshita, neha(meshram) , saket. All of them said that they were deeply touched by the story and even cried while reading it This kind of response to on amateur writer like me means a lot! Thankyou buddies I hope I can deliver credibly in the times to come and not let you down. Shriti didi your comments are always very encouraging. Thanks!. Thankyou anubroto and kapil for your comments. Also my special thanx to my dear bua anita atta(a telugu word for bua) ,because of whom i can proudly say that i have got international readers of my blog( hehehe) !!!!! Now its time to thank the girl who gave the 1^st unknown hit to this blog- vanshri. I didn’t know her earlier. I never told her about my blog, neither did I send her the link but she not only visited the blog but also started following it! Later she sent me a friend request on orkut and I came to know that she’s a friend of neha and saket and from them she heard about the blog. It felt great to know that my blog has started getting word of mouth publicity. A few of my friends read the blog and scrapped me their feedback. Tanpreet said –“ hey acha hai …………par story ki ending achi nai lagi”, that’s the beuty of having a friend like tanpreet, she speaks her heart and is bluntly honest. Always be like this dear, you rock!. Smriti said-“ very nice blog yar… mind blowing”. Thanks for your mind blowing feedback. Neha(katiyar) said-‘ha yar i checkd ur site..very interstng.......try some topcs...i wll sugest sum 2...serusly gr8 going’. Thanx dear .. n I’m waiting for ur suggestions….!! More recently I got my second unknown hit.. a blogger named ‘vijay’ who’s got a very entertaining blog of his own visited the blog and liked it.. yippeee!!!! The best moment for the writer is to see that someone is appreciating your work not just in front of you but also to other people and telling them that it’s a must read ! I got to experience this moment thanx to my dear friend- Neetu . When someone asked her how my blog was she got very excited and made the sign of beautiful with her fingers(luckily I could sneak that moment). WOW .. yipeeee ! believe me that moment gave me sooooo muucchh joy that even topping in 12 board exams cant give ! thanx Neetu !

Lastly I would like to thank my parents for always supporting me and believing in me. Without you all this wouldn’t have been possible. I would like to use this post as a platform to extend my hertleft thanks all the people and places I’ve come across in my life. All my blogs are the reflection of my enriching experiences in life.

Thank you!!!

Cheers !!

prashant

MANN BAWARA... the other side of the story ....

[ BEFORE YOU READ-
Its my request that if you haven't read the first part of the story, then before reading this post please read the first part of the story ie MANN BAWARA.. CLICK HERE !]

She was standing there. The surroundings were glitzy. There were fancy lights shimmering all around. He was standing in a corner with a simple torch of love glowing in his hands. She didn’t look at him. Among all the glitterati his torch looked trivial. Everything was fun and hip. Then suddenly she felt someone was coming from behind. She turned around and saw a huge cloud of darkness throbbing its way towards her. Everything and everyone who come in its way was destroyed. It was not too far away from her and it could devour her anytime. She ran for her life, she ran wherever she could. She was gasping for breath, her heart was thumping hard, and her throat went dry. She couldn’t run anymore the strength of darkness was too mighty to escape from. She let it take her into its embrace. Now, there was darkness and only darkness all around. All the glittering lights were gone. They were too weak to fight with the devilish darkness. She looked around. She found a door which was partially open. A thin beam of light was coming out. She knew from where the light was coming. It was his torch of love. Only his love had the strength that could fight the darkness. She ran towards the door. She held the knob of the door to open it completely. She wanted to go inside; she wanted to be with him. But just when she was opening the door she saw a bright shining light far away. It was just the way she wanted it to be. It was alluring. It was fascinating. It promised success, prosperity. It was her aim. She was still holding the knob of the door. Her aim was right in front of her, she couldn’t give it up. But what about him? His aim was different. ‘How can we walk on the same paths? now I think I love him. But what about my aim. What should I do?’ her inner self was throwing thousand such contradictory questions on her. But she had to take a decision... a tough one indeed. She closed her eyes, bit her lips and shut the door with a bang. She looked at the closed door one last time and then went away. She knew her aim. She could see it clearly. But she was still unhappy. Now she knew her happiness lies with him. But then she had already taken the decision. A decision which had left her alone on the dark paths. She felt helpless. She once again looked at the closed door. It opened. He came out. The torch of love was still glowing. He came and stood beside her. “Let’s walk” he said. 'Why is he so bloody nice to me? I can’t let him suffer with me’ she thought and shouted rudely at him- “I don’t need your support. Go away”. But his eyes were still firm. “I am not here to lend you any support. I’ll just give you company. Moreover it’s quite dark. It’s difficult to locate paths. I have the torch. It will help… US” he said calmly. He held her hand. She felt a surge of confidence inside her. He gave her strength. He became what she needed the most – a companion. They started walking on the paths which slowly started illuminating with the torch of love glowing. On the way he showed her the light coming from his goal. Slowly but steadily the 2 goals were merging and the light was brightening. By the time they reached the destination they found that their goals have merged. The small torch of love had forced the 2 large bright lights to move towards each other and midway they merged. Now it wasn’t her goal or his goal…it was THEIR goal. They together entered the world of their dreams. It wasn’t glitzy but was pleasant. There was happiness all around. she felt as if a huge burden has been lifted off her shoulders. She felt light. She felt relaxed. In his firm arms she felt secure……..

Her eyes opened. She was feeling a heave of tranquility inside. She never knew that she’d find a solution to her dilemma in her sleep. She was going to meet him that day to clear air over a hundred misunderstandings and thousands miscommunications. Now, she knew what she’d say to him. She’ll give this relationship a chance. ‘I am not scared. I know he loves me and always love me . I know he’ll never hurt me we will always be happy together’ she said to herself. She came out of her room. It was Sunday and her father was at home. He was having a hot tiff with someone on phone. She knew who it was on the other side of the phone… her brother. The quarrel was heating up. Her father shouted – “Shut up! We are teaching you on donation in a private collage, spending all our hard earned money on you. What more do you want?” and banged the receiver on the phone. He was fuming with rage. He saw her and shouted – “what? Your sleep is over or you want to sleep even more. What’s there in studies right! Go on do whatever you want. Roam here and there, party, enjoy!.” She was in tears she ran into her room, and dig her face into the pillow and cried bitterly. She cried and cried. ‘What’s my fault? ‘Why did papa shout at me?’ She was thinking and crying. After few minutes the door of her room opened. Her father came in and sat on the bed. He placed his hand on her head. She wasn’t looking at him. He said – “Beta! I’ am really sorry. I should not have talked to you like that. There’s no fault of yours. Actually I’m so stressed and to add to that your brother has become a loafer. He’s not studying anything. We had spent all our life’s savings on him. And I’m helpless. All my hopes are on you. Study hard beta! I know you are working very hard and I have complete faith in you. I know that you won’t let me down. In this age there are a lot of distractions. Don’t get carried away. you very well know how your brother spoiled his life because of a girl. Just take care of yourself. Keep working hard”. He patted her shoulders and left. her father never said such things to her. but as fate would have it he said only that day. Her state of mind was back to square one. The dilemma resurfaced…
At 12.00 she reached the ice cream parlor where they had decided to meet. He was already standing outside. They went inside without speaking a word and sat on table opposite each other. He was looking at her firmly. She couldn’t meet his eyes. She was looking here and there, to avoid eye contact. After few minutes of silence she said – “I’m feeling hungry”. He felt irritated but composed himself. ‘What do you want’ he said standing up. “No no, you sit I’ll bring some chips”, she said and before he could say anything she stood up and went to the chips stand. She stood there for few minutes staring at the chips. After some time she, picked up a packet of ‘lays’ and started examining it as if she was seeing it for the first time. She put it back and took out another packet and then another and then another, till there was no other flavour left. She took 10 minutes to get 2 packets of ‘lays’. He was already very pissed off but he anyhow controlled his temper.
- “Say something”. He said
She bit her cheeks and with great courage she said rudely – “I have nothing to say. You called me. You say something”.
- “Tell me one thing. What do you exactly think about me”.
- Nothing. Nothing at all. And I don’t want to think about you or anyone else”. She said maintaining the rudeness.
- “Then what was that when you said you are having a soft corner for me”. He said, still firm.
- “Did I tell you that”.
-“ No. But you told your friend who told me”.
- “The biggest… biggest fault of mine was to trust her? Anyway why did you believe her? I didn’t tell you anything myself”. She said completely realising how ridiculous the statement was.
- “Are you mad! What are you saying? Someone comes to me and says that you love me. She’s your best friend. Isn’t it but natural that I would believe her”.
-‘Why don’t you understand. I can’t love you”.
For a moment he felt someone was stabbing him to death slowly. But he composed himself and said-
- “Fine. Who’s forcing you to love me? But what’s with the attitude? Look, I quit the idea of us being together long ago. I know that there were still some feelings for you inside me. Now you can’t expect everything to wipe off in a minute right! It was you who started everything all our again with your soft corner talks. But its ok. I understand. I’m still not forcing you for anything. But why can’t you talk to me like we always did”.
- “I don’t like your friend”. She said again conscious of its bizarreness.
- “But I guess he’s your friend too”.
- “Yes. but not anymore”.
- “Fine don’t talk to him, but what have I done”.
- “Look, the truth is I can’t face you”.
- “But why? What’s my fault?
- “No it’s not your fault. Why do you take everything on yourself? Look let me clearly tell you this - ‘I am already disturbed, please don’t hassle me more. I have nothing against you but I just want to escape from everything and everyone. The only thing that matters to me is my aim. ’ She said with a straight face.
For a few minutes, they didn’t say anything. He was still puzzled over what exactly was the matter with her. Only a few days before they had talked and she was very nice to him... to the extent that she was feeling very guilty that she gave him the vibes that she’s got feelings for him. He’d also soothed her calmly that he didn’t take it wrongly, and that it wasn’t her fault. There were just a few misunderstandings and to clear them he had asked her for a promise that they’d sit someday and talk and find answers to all the questions. But this meeting raised even more questions instead of giving answers. And as for her, her eyes were dry but she was crying bitterly. She was looking firm butt she was shattered. Only this morning she decided that she’ll take their relationship a step forward and now due to the sudden turn of events, she had to do all these terrible things. He asked her again with a sigh-“look I’m asking you for the last time. What’s exactly wrong with you? Why don’t you want to face me? Please explain me properly.” She answered back in the rudest tone possible but still not looking at him –“ I don’t find a need to give you any explanations.”

He couldn’t sit there anymore; he felt insulted and was suffocating. He stood up, picked up the packet of chips she had brought for him, went to the counter paid, said something to the shopkeeper, dumped rather trashed the packet of ‘LAYS’ into the dustbin and went to his bike. He paused for a moment… and laughed at his miserable fate. His eyes were moist. He kicked and sped off. Meanwhile she’d also come to the door of the parlor. She saw him disappear into the end of the road. He didn’t even turn once. He was gone. Now she could cry. She did just that. She started leaving shop, tears still flowing out uncontrollably. Just then someone called. She turned around. It was the shop keeper he said a bit hesitantly (she was crying hysterically) – “10 rupees madam. That guy gave only 10 rupees. He said from now on he won't pay for you
.....................................................................................
-by prashant

[DISCLAIMER- THIS IS A PURELY FICTIOUS PIECE OF WORK AND BEARS NO RESEMBLANCE WITH ANY PERSON OR SITUATIONS. ANYTHING OF THAT SORTS IS COINCIDENCE .]